Hard Floors, Life’s Walls

Life is one giant compromise and it is one we all must work with. For me, sitting on the floor of a hospital due to the fact I’m charging my phone, the compromise is giving up comfort in exchange for accessibility. It was an easy choice.

My mum is in surgery, getting a port put in today. This afternoon is round two of chemo. She had pancreatic cancer, but we were fortunate that the doctor was able to cut it. Yet chemo is still a thing because we want to make sure the likelihood of it returning is cut in two.

I wonder why these things happen. Why do our bodies fight us? What is the point of a war in our own flesh when so much of the world around us is already so broken and vile. Why so much pain?

I suppose my mind is whirling. I’ve been to the doctor not all that long ago. I am having…issuess with my reproductive organs. Ever heard of PCOS? My doctor thinks I have it, that it’s highly likely. I have to wait to get an ultrasound, though. This is another issue weighing in my mum’s mind and I wish I hadn’t needed to tell her – alas, she knew I was at the doctor and I will not lie to my mum. Even if I want to.

Life is hard, but forge on we all must. For ourselves and for thise we live. For our hearts and souls, for our minds and health, we cannot give in.

We cannot admit defeat.

8 Comments Add yours

  1. 19dlm94 says:

    So very true, life sometimes is overwhelming but we only lose if we don’t fight.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I wonder live is just getting harder for all of us everyday..
    hang in there and stay hopeful. dont lose hope.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. 93bnmill says:

      Every day is a battle and keeping my spirit up is a battle I choose to win. It may be hard, but I won’t give up.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I am glad you are staying positive. PCOs are so common every other day I hear somebody having it and its not done any major damage to anyone yet. a friend of mine with a severe case of PCOs just had a child.
        this is something I am seeing people having around me.
        take care of yourself. prayers for you and your mom.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. 93bnmill says:

        All the blessings we can get are received with open arms. Blessings are heading your way, too!

        Like

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